Top Ten Things I Learned From Taking a 1-year-old and a 3-year-old to a Wedding

[The following was swiped from my other blog, Training Wheels, which you can find at It's a great resource for families everywhere, not just in midstate PA.]

10. It doesn’t matter if you start getting your kids ready at 12:30 p.m. for a 4 p.m. wedding. One of them will still poop in his diaper at 3:57 p.m.

9. It is absolutely essential to have something with you in the church pew to occupy little ones during the ceremony.

8. If that “something” is Goldfish crackers, be prepared for your child to yell “I want another one!!” during solemn vow-exchange moments.

7. It doesn’t matter if the reception has an open bar or cash bar. You’ll be too busy — and your hands will be too full — to drink much of anything.

6. It’s not a good idea to wear a necklace that looks like a teether.

5. An hors d’oeuvres table looks like a free-for-all to toddlers. They have a very hard time understanding the etiquette behind filling a plate, not grabbing whatever block of cheese looks tasty and eating it immediately.

4. A dance floor is very much like a playground to little kids. Most adults — especially servers carrying heavy trays of hot food — don’t find this amusing.

3. A toddler will be enamored by a DJ’s light and sound system until he is brought to see it up close, at which time he’ll scream bloody murder that “THE LIGHTS ARE TOO LOUD AND SCARY!!!”

2. I can’t slow-dance with my husband unless each of us is holding one of our sons.

And the Number One Thing I Learned From Taking a 1-year-old and a 3-year-old to a Wedding is......

1. Swaying with all three of my boys at the same time is actually pretty great.

BONUS LESSON: The live betta fish centerpiece I thought would be an awesome distraction during the reception gave me more than I bargained for, as I was forced to hold it on my lap for the six-hour car ride home.  Welcome to the family, *Dokey!

[*Named by Kostyn. I'm not convinced he wasn't trying to say "Dorothy," as in Elmo's goldfish. But I'd rather it be Dokey, as in "O-key..."]

1 comment:

Dee said...

and they were so cute dancing with mom and dad!!!! At Chrissy's you can dance all night with your hubby next year!!!